Medicine for my wounds :) Mickey !

Be #Bold … never lose like a Coward… ~~~
I tell you … Change your attitude first…
Now think that , this is the worst loss in ur life, so from now onwards you can face anythng in Life, without any fear of losing ……
See to that , you are THE BEST in every thing you do ….people must cme at the back of you , YOu dnt go back of them …..
Live life like a KING ,,,
Cuttting your hand , would cost you sme hospital charges, and sme blood …. avladha …. nothing big di ūüėõ ūüėÄ ūüôā ….
Eruma Eruma …. Do something , only if it has sme good result , else why waste time in it ? …..
Ada po pa…. Vaazhkaiya Vaazhanum(live life)… nalla Vaazhanum nu(enjoy it), yosi(think) …. looking at you ,Others must¬†wonder …. Life eh
ivlo sandhoshama vaazha mudiyumaa nu ….( if you could live this happily)
I guess you can feel , what i am saying ….. Start Living your Life, lively..¬† ūüôā …
take care dear ūüôā ….

Yet, you fall out too quickly and painfully.

I saw him that day, I don’t know why i did….. But he remembered me, and i did not..! He proved me all the reasons to why a guy like him should be treasured…when i ¬†came to know him throughout few hours i spent with him, he seemed so simple, yet so unique in nature…. because he IS different from the rest and i am sure he will be as always….! He knew from two years back ! and i did not remember him clearly at all. When he moved my fingers to see my face, and say yes, i know her…..i had no clue….but it felt so good when he knew me….when he talked to me…..He talked to me as if he has known me for a long long time ¬†! it felt so strange, yet i found happiness in that strangeness..! When it was time to leave ! i did not want to leave, i wanted to stay longer..! he amused me with his kind actions ! it felt i should stay there for ever..! or that these moments would freeze… it is impossible i know, but when i was with him that was the only thing i could wish for when i met him… When he took that apple when i gave him, i kinda felt accepted…! it¬†reminded¬†me of a twilight cover ‚̧ ¬†and when he respected “ladies’ so much…i have never seen someone like him ¬†who has given so much respect and attention. ¬†when i left the building and the way he followed me to the door, ¬†the way he was eager to know to what i was talking, the way my heart did not want to leave that place…..when i went to my locker, the way he waited for me..! is this all really for me ? is there really so much meaning behind all this ? am i getting too excited ? am i getting too happy ? i do not know, i have not behaved like this before, but why now? but why to him ? when i left those doors i did not know if i will ever see him again? if i will ever talk to him again? but i wanted to talk , i wanted to see him again… i told my friend to get his id…and i left….

When he says “Yo” i think of so many things that i wish that he really meant what i thought of. i wish he would text me in the morning, and when i do not text, i want him miss me just once….!

It was¬†Thursday¬†March. 29. 2012 i saw him…! and wished i would see..! if fate allowed us to meet again…and then we did in my¬†tuition¬†class on¬†Saturday¬†! i finished mine and he walked in, i felt happy, i was jumping in joy…..on the way to¬†tuition, i swear to god i was thinking if he goes to the school near by, will he come to the¬†tuition..? i did not finish my thought about him, and there he was..! at that moment i believed in him, i believed in miracles… i went home smiling…. it felt like my home brightened a little more that day ! i went to sleep with thoughts of him ! memories of him! moments of his meeting to my eye !

I talked to him over the long weekend in april, and i wished wont another longweekend come ? ūüėõ

i always looked for reasons to meet him… i always expected him on every¬†Thursdays… i did not tell him how happy i was, but i kept it within me ! so from that i looked forward to every¬†Thursdays..!

But i feel as though he does not feel the same ! i feel as though my thoughts are different from his…! i do not know, i have not asked, but it hurts when he does not understand what i tell him not in words but in actions…because in everything i do he is there my sunshine ! my dear-u my jaan ‚̧

Unspeakable silence of words…. that are haunting me..!

I have been telling myself for so long to be strong…. and i was on roll on that for few months i guess…. then comes the gloomy days…where nowdays i dun even knw who to trust anymore…even the ones who seem very close to us lie to you, cheat you, hide things from you….. unbelievable how people change so much and how much that changes hurt another person…! i had a friend who was very close to me when i was in grade nine….. or i thought she was….. even then she talked about me to other people…! well she would say i gossiped about them..! and somehow ruined the friendship tht i had with other people…..! then off she goes on ¬†a flight and doesnt show up for nearly 3 years….! i was missing her a lot….i wished she was here..! and sometimes when we talked we talked about our good old days of grade nine stories..! the fun we had for four months of school..! seems like i dont even know this girl completely for a year and there i was yearning for her presence…. how silly, how schwpuid..! aiyoooo…!

SHE comes back, and does her same old dirty lies….goes around to people and talk about me behind my back and is still friendly with me…….! i cant believe her.! then she becomes friends with another friend of mine completely forgets about me…. forget us…forget the memories…..its hurts when people forget…..

NO NO TRUST..! yea i couldnt trust her…..there she wa…going around acting all nice around me and being friendly….! and there was another side to her when she hid from me….a side that i knew very well of..! she lied to me for someone else…..she hid the truth for me…… she crushed my friendship for her…. the day she did i had no respect for her…. i may not have been with her during happy times…!but i was there everytime she had tears in her eyes…i was there every time she needed me …and YET all she CARED about was being with her new friend….

I lost too many things in life….i had very difficult time coping without them…..it was in every thought of mine….it was there in every happiness of mine…! and suddenly to have it broken hurt like the core..!

i was lost….i was helpless…! all people wanted to see was me smiling all the time..! oh cum’on i m HUMAN….and i cry sometime…and i have the right to not smile, yet they irritate me so much…!

sometimes i wanna go back home…sleep on the¬†Terrace…and forget about everything…better yet… i wanna sleep on my grandma’s lap and talk non stop to her and bug her…. i dont want this pain of staying here…

i wanted to come back…buh i had these restrictions like a fence….and now that fence seems to be between you and me….[ it wont make sense to you, buh in my world it does] i m sorry reader

i am just ranting out my thoughts and feelings…because i dont want to break down…

i cried a lot today….i had no words to tell anyone how i feel..

the one who i want to listen,  is not talking to me

the one i want to share with, is so far away..!

i just stayed quiet at some things today

NEVER GET ACCUSTOMED TO ANYONE, ANYTHING….. it hurts you so much when it leaves…

a lesson everyone learns in life….buh it is a lesson tht ¬†i have been going thru fr a long time

Another friend of mine was with me in my one of my fav.classes….! and yet today she decided to drop the class…

i had nothing but tears

i had no words to express

i just stayed quiet

bcos i know tmrw she will not be with me in my class tmrw…

so what now is the point i cry after she decided to leave?

life goes on……………

hopefully all will be fine !

all is well….

Thank you to all my readers who have been reading my words………….!